Jayanti,
This is a personal issue for me, as it is hard to rise above the notion that the other is the problem. I wonder how much of our own faults we project onto others? Mother certainly had enough around her to find fault with. It was her destiny to love and not critcize, teach and not interfere.
Mother lived the life. Everything She spoke of came from Her own personal life and direct experience and thus Her sayings always manages to touch us deep within.
There are 2 issues here. First, is there any benefit of mentioning the faults a person may have? Will that person change? The second issue is, what is the effect on us when we look at another person’s fault? We all are aware of the responses to the above questions. Mother, then goes ahead to give a simple solution. THINK POSITIVE. Dwell on the good. Thinking about the good will leave a positive impression on your mind. As Sri Ramakrishna would say “If you move towards to East, the West is further left behind” The Mother also reminds us about this, explaining that when we dwell on the positive behaviors of people, we move away from the negative behaviors in our own lives.
Rosemary, we all struggle with the same issues that you do, perhaps there lies the strength of the courtyard. But NEVER think you are alone. Mother is with each one of us every step of the way.
Mother as we enter the third day of Navratra, bless us that we may move towards you.
