Thanks for your thoughts on Dakshineshwar and Belur. However, even though you did not perceive being uplifted did the visit later not culminate with your receivig Diksha?
Having received the mantra from your Gurudev did you not begin your spiritual journey? I think you have yourself answered these questions so I personally view both that visits as being fruitful.
No one knows the ways of the Mother. Why She does what She does. Have faith and patience as a child does when he is with his mother, know She will make arrangements for you. Holy Mother would always stress on the “ripeness of time”, when the time is ripe, it will happen. So also when you mention your visits and don’t feel so positive about it, I am sure that was all a preparation for your real journey into the spiritual world.
I did not mention Ridgely, New York here in USA. This place is Swamiji all over. There are life size pictures and the shrine is so vibrant. They have also kept the room where Swamiji slept like a shrine. All these places are always there to inspire us.
Let me share once again what I once asked Swami Bhuteshananda when I met him at Belur. I told him that at Belur or such places the mind is calm and peaceful and easily mmoves towards the spiritual plane, however this flow doesn’t remain once we leave those special places and how could I ensure that the mood was maintained. He smiled very sweetly and told me “You are looking for it on the outside so it doesn’t stay with you. Once you look for it inside (and he pointed to his own heart) then you will always feel the inspiration.
May Mother bless us all that we may always feel this inspiration.