Anon,
You have brought up two points that came to my mind on reading your original post, but did not want to address as I was not sure I was in my place to do so...however, as they have been touched on...here goes...
You did confuse me as to your actual dilemna...is it love you are seeking? There did appear to me to be some confusion as to the nature of love in your mind...
Also, the other point... what do you see as your divine purpose here in the body??

Do you want to follow the path of the celibate sadhu, or are you like some of Master's disciples whom he directed to live as householders? It is my belief that you must look within and listen to the whisperings of the Master.
Somehow, I feel sure that He will lead you.
Also, as a sort of disclaimer, I would like to say that I have not reached any level of knowledge to give spiritual advice...I can only tell you what I feel from a womanly instinct about your situation...
I wonder where Jayanti is???

"Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you"

Location: North Carolina

Jayanti has been caught playing in maya!

My thoughts, while reading this post.

"It is not for the sake of the husband that the husband is loved, but for the Atman (Higher Self) that is within the husband.
"It is not for the sake of the wife that wife is loved, but for the Atman (Higher Self) that is within the wife.
"It is not for the sake of the child that the child is loved, but for the Atman (Higher Self) that is within the child, etc."

A swami, whom I consulted recently about playing in maya, said that people tend to forget that the manifest world is also Brahman. It's easy to think about rejecting the world for God; but wisdom to recognize where we are and trying, as spiritual practice, to see the divine in the world around us.

Sri Ramakrishna likened renunciation to a scab. If we tear it off before the sore heals the would will likely become infected. We must allow worldliness to fall from us naturally, like the scab falls from the healed wound. In the meantime we can practice those disciplines which encourage our love for God just as we take care of a wound so it may heal quickly.

I forgot to say that I have not read the book, but will look into it.

Hey, Anthony, & Web Admin...and all who are reading the posts here...

Location: North Carolina

Thank you, Jayanti!! I was hoping someone would be able to say that...I felt that the falling away of desires must come naturally, but did not have the background research to make the statement...Meantime, Anon, please do not beat yourself up!!

Location: North Carolina

A long, long time ago I heard an explanation of how to get children to share their toys...and it always had deep psychological implications for me on many different levels.

If a parent asks a very young child (we are talking about a 3 year old level, maybe) to share or give up a toy, and the child balks and refuses, then it means that the child does not have a feeling of ownership for the toy. The child must first come to the realization that the toy is his, only then, can the child make his own decision about the act of relinquishing.

You see, it does not mean that the child is greedy or stingy or that the parent is a bad parent. The process just has not finished in the mind of the child..

This explanation has been a big help to me.

Jai Ma!

Location: North Carolina

Very good one as I have found from practical experience! Enjoy as if it belonged to you. Leaving it is then easy for you feel some interest in its/his/her welfare! Making sense? Lust has been my achilles heel, it emanated from my real disease, unhealthy ego. Company of the children of God (not in the Vedantic sense of all being His children) is the only remedy for me at present not to go berserk. His child, Fhanindra has given me the love to continue to fight. He asked me, do you want to die or live. I choose to live. Then you have to fight, he said. The good company is the most important. Don't read too much, Anon. I have read legions. ANd it has only given me excuses to hide my weaknesses. Then Holy Mother thrashed me (I used to cry like a madman, Kali Ma(identical with Sarada), Kali Ma, beat me, in our language! And I am much better for the beating! Matter of personal experience, not to be taken literally or emulated at all.

Location: Guwahati, Assam, India

Anon, one another point with regard to lust. Patience, patience, patience, accept, accept, accept your weaknesses as they are. It will make you a better person. MOTHER(NATURE) KNOWS WHEN TO TUEN OFF THE TAP, SAYS SRI FHANINDRA. How I hated myself and others, the objects of my lust when my ordeal started ten years ago! Then, Holy Mother mellowed me and today I am a little more at peace though unable to see the shore in any way yet. Believe in MA no matter what happens. She is kindness incarnate.
ps. Don't dwell too much on the thoughts you don't like, says Sri Fhanindra.
Love.

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Replying to:

What does one do to control sexual thoughts? I seem to find it impossible to keep my mind chaste.........

I was previously very devoted to God, and even moderate control of such thoughts was possible, then i fell in love with a member of the opp sex, i was totally obssessed with that person, even my prayers became less, and my thoughts revovled arouns that person and not around God..... nothing much came of it, the person didnt seriously care about me...

but even now, i feel a lot has changed about me and my way of thinking, i am 25 yrs old, previously i thought a lot of leading a spiritual life, but now i no longer seem to constantly desire it, i find myself wanting a worldy life............

but when i look around i see relationships breaking, who truly loves anyone here, the wonderful state of mind i was in previously has gone for good, i feel a lot has changed about me...... for the worse im afraid

i try to pray, but prayer without renounciation is not the same thing is it? everywhere in the books published by the Ramakrishna mission i read the importance of continence.

Location: Guwahati, Assam, India