From the Reminiscences The Holy Mother - 24-12-2015
Swami Apurvananda’s First Darshan of Maa!!!
I followed the devotees as they advanced up the stairs; on reaching upstairs, I noticed that in front of the door to a room, each one lowering his head to the floor by way of salutation and then going down another staircase on the other side. I went forward; there was none behind me. When I reached the door I saw Mother seated, wrapped in a white silk shawl from head to foot, her face veiled, even her feet being invisible. My heart sank, but there was no time for delay. I knelt and lowered my head to the ground to offer pranam – perhaps for a few seconds or a minute I remained thus, my eyes filled with tears. As soon as I raised my head, I saw that Mother had set aside the shawl and revealed her face. She was looking at me tenderly. I was overwhelmed with joy. As soon as I stretched my hand to touch her feet, Mother, smiling, wiped away my tears with her hand, and touching my chin, kissed me (in traditional Indian style). Then, in a very sweet voice she asked, “Son, have you had prasad?” Gazing at her face I just said, “Yes, Mother, I have.” That was all – only this brief exchange. My heart was full, moved by her loving touch and sweet words. I just gazed at Mother in wonder – it was her that I had seen during my meditation
that morning. That same mother-figure, wearing a white sari with a very narrow red border, had held me on her lap, pressed me to her bosom, kissed and caressed me all over in so many ways. I felt that I was dreaming. I suppressed the desire to ask Mother about it and left after touching her feet once again. Having gone a few steps, I looked back to find Mother still seated as before, gazing at me affectionately. Her eyes were following me. Now, after all these years, I have come to realize that however far I may go, I can never go beyond the range of her vision.
MOTHER’S GRACE – by SWAMI APURVANANDA (REMINISCENCES OF Sri Sarada Devi by Monastics, Devotees, and others - Compiled and Edited in Bengali by SWAMI PURNATMANANDA - Translated by MALOTI SEN GUPTA : P 53-54)
