From the best that I remember of Sri Ramakrishna's words, the incident does not involeve the Tiger but an elephant! and Sri Thakur clearly instructed that while the god elephant is on the rampage, be attentive to the words of God mahut (Person who is controlling the elephant) to clear the way, else the elephant would trample you.
There was also the elephant story told by Satwik. In both, Sri Ramakrishna was illustrating how we need to respond appropriately to the various forms of God which appear before us.
Thus, one doesn't bow down before the tiger god -- one runs to safety, for example. In this same context he sad that one needs to worship god in the horse by feeding it oats and not by waving a light before the horse, as one does during shrine worship.
The thought that came to me is this. In many abusive situtations we are called upon to recognize the danger as it is, and to take the appropriate action in order to remove ourselves from danger ... just as we must be aware that the tiger will likely attack us if we do not get away.
Trying to "calm" an abusive person can be like "bowing down" before a tiger; neither of which is especially appropriate. But the idea is not one of judging what is right and what is wrong. Rather it is learning the nature of a situation and acting appropriately. If you will, it may be the tiger's nature to attack, but one need not place oneself in the position of being attacked on its account.
Dear Rosemary,
I can feel the pain,hopelessness and fear you must have felt. I offer you brotherly love and affection.
You have come to the right place to reveal your sorrows. Only holy mother can soothe your agony. Continue praying to her and you will receive consolataion and the answer to your questions.